Your Journey To Self-Love
“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”
Falling in love is easy. You can fall in love without even trying. Without even wanting to! That’s the easy part. Learning who to give that love to is a little more tricky. Self-love is the best love, but it’s often over-looked.
We experience love differently throughout our lives, but it changes us none the less. Some for the better and some far worse, but there’s always a lesson. Just imagine, if you can love someone else so completely, so blinded and unwillingly, I’m certain you can love yourself.
“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”
— Lucille Ball
The journey of love starts as a child. For most children, love is family. You see it in a toddler’s face as it lights up at just the sight of you! Love is in family vacations and laughing with siblings and it all comes so naturally, so carefree. Just as it should be. Pure and easy.
For Teens, it’s crazy and intense love. When friendships and relationships trump the big love you once had only for family. Teen Love is more infatuation, experimentation, parties, late night adventures. Some sort of puppy love and experiencing as much of it as you can. A type of no limits love. It’s more superficial. Not so pure and simple anymore. In fact it was this teen love that led to my now 18 year old daughter. Lucky for me, she’s experiencing teen love with a little more caution.
Ahhh nowadays though, love is a little different. Much more tame. Love now, is my hubby clearing off the snow atop my car before he heads to work. It’s the security in knowing that he will always be there and never seems to let me down. It’s the unconditional love I have for my children. I love when my youngest daughter hugs me out of nowhere. And when her face lights up at just the sight of me! I’m also lucky enough to have a few real friendships, the ones with no drama, love those.
There’s also plenty of things I truly love. Not material things. There’s a love for the small window of quietness in the evening when the kids are finally asleep. That’s gotta be real love right? And sleep. I LOVE sleep. Oh and food… like crab legs, and Reece peanut butter cups and cheese pizza. I mean who doesn’t love that?
Yep, love is a little different these days. It’s more quality and value. It’s good health and most importantly it is self-love. When I started to fall in love with myself, everything seemed to fell in to place. I’m not a narcissist. It is okay…no it’s super okay to love yourself. For me, it helped in loving others more. I used to struggle with self-love and self-confidence.
It’s easy to get caught up in bad relationships, or in putting all of your efforts into others- your kids, your job, your toxic relationships, leaving you with very little for YOU!
Ready For Love?
Buy yourself some flowers. Have a bubble bath. Eat an entire pie (I don’t judge. I’m probably do that right now). Bake and hike and watch your fave movies:) Some important mental steps in order to truly pass my self love rehab: Forgive yourself! Forgive yourself for allowing negative behaviors in the past.
Quit blaming yourself! Stop blaming yourself for things that have gone wrong in your life! It’s not your fault. Think happy thoughts! Let go of negative feelings like self-criticism, sadness and anger. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Use positive affirmations when negative thoughts arise. Stop worrying! Don’t stress about the unknown. Story worrying about the future and trust yourself. Take care! And, stop comparing yourself to others.
Feed your passions. Do what you love! Make sure you are getting enough sleep, and physical exercise. Eat with the intent to heal. Challenge yourself and put you first. Recognize when you’re feeling emotionally drained and fill your cup before it’s empty. Express yourself! Communicate your feelings with others. Your needs matter! Often as parents we forget this and it takes a toll on our mental health. Write it down! Putting your thoughts on paper is therapeutic. And if you experience a tough time you can look back on better days knowing tough times don’t last forever. Get help! Never be too ashamed to seek professional help from a doctor, counselor, therapist etc.
Morgan Jo of barbedwireandlaceblog.com has a great post with more tips on how to take back your power after dealing with toxicity!
Take a day as a reminder that you are worthy of your love too!
Find love… in your friends, family, pets, and most importantly in yourself:)
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